So let’s just get right to it. As much as I want to have this amazing life
at the moment, I feel more and more every day like I am barely getting through
each day above water. Most of you know
my drill and most of you would say I have it pretty good. I do.
I’m not denying that. My family and
my life are pretty ‘amazing’. But I just
don’t feel amazing most of the
time. I feel like I fall short every day
– On lots of things.
So I have this three year old. Who.
I. ADORE. And who also loves to
ask “why” until there are no answers left for me to give. Who has a ton of energy. Who drops f-bombs at appropriate times. Who likes to do everything himself. I really do try to give him lots of
rope. To let him try experiments that I
don’t think will work, but he has to test them out. To go outside after dinner, when it’s dark
out, to sort rocks until bathtime just because.
And with all of this ‘energeticness’ he often gets frustrated. I try to remind him when he says “I can’t
Mom”, and respond “did you try your best?”
Sometimes yes, sometimes no – but he almost always TRIES AGAIN. If he’s unable, I help him. If he’s able – total win.
It seems such an easy piece of advice for me to give my
toddler.
One year ago – almost to the day – I was prepping my family
to travel to New Zealand where my first order of business was to finish my second
Ironman. We went and I did. I was in the best shape of my life. I am now 9 weeks post partum and any
triathlete dreams I have for this summer seem unattainable. I’m sore after yoga. I’m so tired that the thought of getting up
early or staying up late to get in a workout seems ridiculous. And I recently told my husband that I wasn’t
going to race this summer because I just don’t see how I’ll have time. I was ready to put one of the biggest things
that makes me me, on hold, because I couldn’t find the time. And I realized, it was, simply honestly, less
scary for me to not try than it was for me to fail.
The other day T and I were playing ‘hockey’ – rolled up
coloring books are ‘whackers’, a golf ball is our ‘ball’ and we ‘pitch’ the
ball by hitting the ball with the whackers back and forth – he finds so many
ways to play new games - and the ball went under the couch for the millionth
time. I just couldn’t reach it without
moving the couch AGAIN. I just. Couldn’t. do. It. And then T says “Just try your best
Mom”. I started to cry. Of course that wasn’t my best. Just move the stupid couch. Who cares if it was the millionth time it
happened – just get the ball.
And I started to think. I must try my best.
It’s important to understand the difference between trying
your best and doing your best. You can
always try your best. You can’t always do
your best. Your best is different every day. You’re tired. You’re dehydrated. You just don’t have the right mindset. Some days you do your best, some days you
don’t. So today, I tried my
best. I ran for 3 x 1 minute parts of
my walk – not much but more than I did yesterday. I signed up for yoga classes
for the rest of the month. I ate half a
chocolate bar (ok, I could have skipped that part, but it felt good). And the triathlons I have on the calendar – I
signed up and paid for. So look out – 4
triathlons on the calendar in pen – 1 pending. Doesn’t matter what I look like in my tri kit
– Chances are I’ll be the only one with a 6 month old on my hip when I go up to
get my medal!
So, Just Try Your Best Mamas. With your Friends. With your Kiddos. With your Family
Members. With your Partners. And most importantly Try your best for
yourself and whatever makes you the wonderful YOU that you are.
